If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
he puts the penis in happiness.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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