can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
