fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I love you. Go after that dick
I came so hard my ears popped.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
