I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize