wake up i wanna do it froggy style
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Is that strawberry winking at me??
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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