Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
