Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize