Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
