I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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