So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
