Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
