Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
