You smell like stripper and shame
it glows. i had to have it.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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