dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
