so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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