If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
The air was thick with penises
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
