I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
