we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
My bed smells like the plague
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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