Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize