party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
