I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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