Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
is that a dick in a sweater?
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