Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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