I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
