i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
