they need to just BURY HIM!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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