I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
