everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
All I want is dick and wine.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize