This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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