Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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