but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
