theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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