i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize