"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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