You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
