YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
