Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
