Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
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