It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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