Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize