Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
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