I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize