dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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