What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
