my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
