I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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