I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
