Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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