yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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