I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize