I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize