My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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