porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
